


A song for the past

by KaneNogami



Category: Kamen Rider Gaim
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-15
Updated: 2014-10-15
Packaged: 2018-02-21 07:31:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2460050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaneNogami/pseuds/KaneNogami
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zack and Peco visit a familiar tree each time they get the chance. As if they could find everything back while sitting on the tall branches. Perhaps moving on is not that much of a challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He could tell when Kaito wished for him to remain a little longer. To lay against the tree for a moment and forget the world (although without forgiving it). Some days, laying down on a high branch, Zack wondered how he knew all these things he guessed one after another. Ah, he was not the one meant to know the answers. That was secondary to the gentle breeze against his face. Leaves felt on his mouth or nose, from time to time. Some were filled with the late afternoon rain and he shivered when they hit his skin. The other was probably mocking him. How ridiculous he was, to believe in such afterlife. No one could love a tree nor a ghost. Perhaps the other was neither though. Kaito was simply himself, as he had always been. A glimpse of him could be caught a couple of times, when Zack's eyelids were getting too heavy and he could not distinguish what was real any longer. He did not mind. A foolish dream could be an appropriate way to figure out how to hope.

The world needed him for the moment. Yet he felt the urge to crawl between the tall branches, shoes forgotten at the bottom of the tree. He could not go each day, but that was okay. As long as no one forgot. Somehow, he wished for this place to remain his alone. As if sharing was a crime. Being selfish was okay now that they have won their most important battles. He did not want to feel forgotten any longer. To be one who could not comprehend what his real purpose was. No, such words were unfit. He deserved as much as the others.

Kaito had called him strong.

There was only one choice. He had to accept those words and respect them. Proving his worth was something he could do. His eyes were struggling to remain open by now, and the sky was becoming heavy with menacing clouds. Zack did not fear the rain though. The tree would protect him. Lighting would not dare to strike it down. There was nothing to fear. Hence the way he allowed his body to win and carry him into slumber.

_Aren't you wasting your time?_

The corner of his lips twitched as Zack heard the words spreading in his mind, colliding with the edges. He had no idea of the reply he was meant to throw in return. Instead, he remained silent, unsure of being awake or in the middle of a pleasant dream. Something hit his leg, perhaps a branch or a foot.  
Zack let out a small laugh, not wishing to break the illusion just yet. 

“Who knows?” He mocked his lover, in the same way they had always done. People would have told so many stories about them, if they had known. Kaito was too prideful to care about anyone's opinion and Zack was good at pretending. The weight moved against his chest, and he could feel strong fingers pressing against his heart, to make sure it was still beating. 

_You have done an okay job until now. You could improve though. Isn't it obvious?_

“Shut up, Kaito.”

His smile turned into a grin, one who made him feel as if he had something to look forward to other than running back to his place. If Zack tried to touch him back, would he vanish? There were so many risks he did not want to take. His boyfriend represented the sun, the sky and the stars after all. Shining with bigger ambitions he had ever had. Soul filled with small incidents and proofs of who he was. Daring to lift his hand, Zack allowed the tip of his fingers to press against a covered elbow. The fabric felt soft under his touch. Each time he could tell the world became closer to the reality he wished for. Or his dreams were simply a more accurate representation of what he was craving to get back.

_Don't focus on the past. Move on._

That moron was being unfair once again. The thought could have belonged to Peco instead of himself and Zack laced his fingers with the rebellious hand who was trying to escape him. He did not want to wake up. Not yet at least.  
“I try. No, I do. But you are my future too.” Zack felt the urge to explain as he dragged the hand against his lips, breathing softly against the skin. All of this lacked sense. “I want to build a world you would have enjoyed to live in too.” Despite not going as far or in the same brutal way. No, his path was less dangerous. Or so he hoped.

_It's your life, not mine. I lived already._

There was an appropriate reply to such words. Zack opted to ignore it. Instead he started to let go, feeling the hand he was holding fading away. Soon he would be back under the tall branches, a few drops of water hitting his face one after another. “Live again.” He tried to say, the words coming out as strangled. Those were definitely wrong. He did not want to coax the other into another lifetime filled with mistakes. Yet, he needed him. 

_I do, you are not able to acknowledge that not all lives are akin to the way you imagine them, that's all._

Not the reply he had hoped for. Albeit not the worst either. There was no attempt to reply on his part. Not when his eyes were slowly opening. There was only darkness around and he realized he had fallen asleep already. Sighing, he sat up, rubbing his knuckles against his chest, where he had imagined the contact. Warmth spread against his chest, and Zack found himself a little better. At least for a while. They needed to finish this conversation one day. However, for now, he had to go back.

“I love you.” The tall male commented, jumping off as if there was no danger despite the lack of light. He stumbled around for a moment, until he found his shoes.  
As he started to walk away, the wind blew the tallest branches and the sound which escaped the tree sounded like a melody.

“I'll come back tomorrow, Kaito.”


	2. Chapter 2

He lacked the capacity to climb while being graceful. Not that anyone was around to witness the disaster. His pride couldn't help but feel grateful. The ground was covered in mud anyway and Peco did not enjoy to throw his head backward in order to do more than glancing at the magnificent tree. That tall and annoying thing would have been a more appropriated title. His body fought until he finally managed to sit on a low branch, trying to catch his breath. So much for having fought monsters and escaped danger countless times the year before.

What a damn joke. He was no hero at all. Groaning, the teenager dragged his knees under his chin, trusting his ability to maintain his balance for a while. Such a weird place for comfort. He expected something different probably. His words were caught in his throat, purged before he could force any of them out. As if the fear of being judged remained. Yet, there was no use to be here only for the silence. The boy was aware he put the blame on others for the mere fact it was easier. Less of a chore than accepting his own mistakes. 

Micchy did not deserve anything though. The others had already forgiven him a long time ago. People like them could only see the future. What was the point? Only the present mattered. The scars which remained and the way he would never go to college or follow any plan his parents had made for him because he had ceased to care about these things before even knowing they existed. 

Water was splashed on his face, the wind shaking a branch higher than he was. Peco let out a disgusted noise, wiping his cheeks with his sleeve a couple of seconds later. “That's not funny.” The warning would have no consequence, he already knew it. Instead, he ended up mocked once more as remains from the rain decided to darken his hair.

He recalled the dream from a couple of weeks before as he sighed, in a loud and childish manner. Mai came to visit him and for a moment, they were together on a giant stage in the middle of a beautiful forest. Nothing had seemed that odd, not even his friend's appearance. It was only at the end, when he had opened his eyes to find himself in front of the tree, after having sleep-walked, that Peco had realized something was perhaps not usual. 

He had never regretted his habit of sleeping only in boxers before that day. 

“I don't know.” He admitted, reluctant to do so. “I don't know why I'm here or what I should say.” Was there even a point in staying? Peco could not have been able to tell. The branches bended under the wind, enough for the moon to be hidden for a moment. Darkness was far from being comforting. Just as the rain was linked to painful memories.

(He was a loser, he had sent Mai to her death twice.)

Something pressed against the top of his head forcing him to lower it. Such things had never happened before, and Peco found himself shocked by the lack of fear in his heart. He should have been freaked out. Instead, he closed his eyes, as if he could erased what he couldn't bear to see that way.

“I don't want to forgive him! He hurt me and now I'm the jerk because I want to make sure they rem--” A palm was pressed against his mouth as he heard someone crouching in front of him, the branch letting out a small sound under the added weight.

_Then don't._

The voice was familiar. Perhaps too much. And he found himself struggling to recall that his mind was certainly playing a trick on him. The answer lacked any sense. He could not just go against the world. He was bound to lose if he did so.

_You can be angry at him. Although not if you throw all your problems on his shoulders. You have always been quick to do that. It's why you enjoyed to be in people's shadows when we met. Easy to hide your flaws behind theirs._

Unfair words he had not wished to hear. He couldn't push the hand covering his mouth away though. Not when he would have been afraid of grasping only thin air. Kaito (he knew it was him) released him quickly though and Peco kept his eyes closed, fighting the wish to open them.

“I don't want you to lecture me. I'm not a child any longer.”

_You are the only one calling yourself like this. Everyone is aware of your strength except for yourself._

“You should have said goodbye.” Peco was talented at switching subjects when it suited him. Less problematic than acknowledging something was wrong with his mind sometimes. His head was lifted a little, fingers under his chin, perhaps to prove such words would not accomplish anything. Kaito had never wished for him to act like a coward.

_Do you want me to, Peco?_

The boy considered the question for a moment, eyes clenched shut to the point of feeling a headache coming. “No.” It was too early. He would not have been able to let go yet. Just as he had to fight Micchy for a while, until he could guess how to deal with the aftermath of what had happened.

_You have the time to figure out what you want. Don't base your life on going against others to protect yourself. That will not work._

His face relaxed as he felt a hand covering his closed eyes. Soon the conversation would be over along with the night. Zack came during the day, Peco had figured out that much. So the nights were his. When he could pretend there was no fear in his heart and that he would not freeze his ass off by wearing only shorts and thin shirts. 

“Can I dance for you one day?” Once again, he refused to reply directly to the answer, despite the way he memorized each word.

_You already do it every day, don't you? As a member of the team I created._

The hand was removed from his eyes, along with the presence by his side. Peco blinked a couple of times as the moon was visible again, albeit starting to vanish in the sky which was waking up.

Perhaps he could wait for Zack the next afternoon.


End file.
